BOOZERS 'N BAMBOOZLERS


DOORS

What's a feller supposed to do
When he can't figure out which door to choose
Standing there in desperation
Hoping for some consideration
Should he use door number one or number two

It's not like a Television game show
The poor feller's just gotta go
But someone was cruel
With signs for the stool
And labeled them so no one would know

Standard signs for each gender
"LADIES" or "MEN"  from the vendor
Are replaced by humor
For the unwary consumer
Likely to become a "wrong-door offender"

Sometimes it's simple to figure out
"COWBOYS" or "COWGIRLS" leaves no doubt
But confusion ensues
A wrong door might amuse
Or cause one hell of a shout

Sometimes it's frustration
When a feller is in desperation
Holding back
A bladder attack
And premature urination

Sometimes it's a good guffaw
When your teeth don't need to gnaw
No need to worry
You're in no hurry
Just laugh at the chutzpah

When comfort rooms are outside the gate
The owner makes it easy to decide your fate
Men, first tree to the right
Ladies, left, out of sight
All others need to go straight


© 2026 Brian McNeal




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